Tuesday, July 31, 2012

First Name Errors: A Serious Matter




Twenty-eight years of my life and of my existence and still my life hasn't move on into the life I was always dreaming of. Why? Because from the start of it, I wasn't even settled into the right way. Funny and dramatic but it's the reality. Yes, for some 'first name errors', on a serious matter, I still can't move on.


The Birth

I was born on February 21, 1984 with my parents' happiness  as my mom gave birth to a cute baby girl(love your own :)). With the excitement they had, together with the elders whom had they took advice on how to take good care of a child, they named me after my father's first name, Dionessa. Please don't gave any comment about it, I wasn't even giving any. :) I was left at the hospital for I had to be confined for the reason that I ate some of the wastes on my mother's womb. After a month, it was then I finally got home. But for the first three months, I wasn't enjoying my baby life for I was always getting sick.

The Life-changing Decision

Filipinos respect their elders and every opinion they gave really affects each family they get involved. So as one of the elders gave an advice to my parents whom are very young at their age at that moment, that the reason behind my sickness was I myself doesn't like the name they had gave me. Yes, I wasn't liking my name, as the elders said. How'd they know? We'll, maybe I wasn't really liking my name at all. Don't even mention it to my father. Anyways, I was baptized in the name of Mary Charmaine Ness Nioda and eventually after the 'baptism',  the sickness I was suffering faded away.

The' School' Stage

I wonder how I went to school with the conflict I had in my birth certificate. I haven't even realize how hard it is when the legal papers matter. Guess what? As of now, I am using Ma. Charmaine Ness Nioda, as you can see on myprofile here. I know, you feel like I'm riding on a roller coaster with different angles and heights. Wish you weren't like me.

Anyways, I did notice that I had a 'forge' birth certificate when I went to college and settle my own requirements by myself,  although, in my entire life I did know all about my name. But the university I attended to, haven't even questioned the certification I submitted to them. So I was thinking it was ok then.

The Realization

Along the college days, my friends and I decided for us to get a job at the same time. So, we look for jobs during the day for we  attended school during late times at the day, an evening students. So we went looking on fast food chains and given the requirements, I was stunned! One of the requirements should be NSO(National Statistics Office) authenticated birth certificate. Whew!!! That was it. I, having different names, wasn't getting the job I was looking for, mainly with the reason of conflict legal birth certificate.

That was one of the discouragement I had until some things did change my life. Have you had the feeling of not getting into somewhere you were dreaming of? That was what I feel until now.

I did look for jobs but jobs whom doesn't require any legal papers at all. What was the reciprocity? No benefits at all; Phil health, SSS, Pag-ibig etc. only with a much lesser salary that the law requires to. The worst was, I cannot even work abroad for we all know that there is much chance of a lightier life when you work abroad. A chance for you to get your dreams much closer than working here in the Philippines, as we all know, economy reality, but not degrading the government at all.

Lessons in Life

I'm not even blaming my parents for I understand that what they did was for my own sake but risking in reality. But how I really wish they haven't done this at all. Now, being a mom and a woman, I see to it that I am using the right thing to my children when in terms of their names. I rest assured that what's registered on the Civil Registry, the baptismal and the name they are using is not conflicting with each other. I am into this trouble, so I won't even wanted my children  or anyone get into this. I just hope the parents would really see to it and assured themselves the security to their children because my whole life change at all the moment my parents change my name.

The Solution

But it's not at all too late. :) I did research on the internet and do some work on going to the Civil Registry Office to do the homework. What I found out that it was really not too late for me to fix this trouble at all. What just made me discourage was the amount I should spend on to fix this. I heard that the processing fee is three thousand pesos plus the other requirements plus the two weeks publishing and the four to six months processing. See, it's even harder but at least there is this chance.

The Requirements

I went to the Civil Registry office one day to ask for the requirements for me to get fix my first name error. But the officer in-charge told me to present first my Certification of Live Birth. So what I did was I look for other sources and finally found out the requirements I should submit in terms of fixing my first name errors. What I found was:

RA 9048 (known as) correction of clerical error birth, marriage & death (CCE) and change of first name (CFN)

Requirements:
·         Certificate of Live Birth, Marriage & Death
·         Baptismal Certificate
·         Secondary & College Transcript of Records
·         Valid Identification Card
·         Police Clearance
·         NBI Clearance
·         Affidavit of Two Disinterested Person

That's it but here's the steps to be followed (the hard-long steps):

❶Receiving/Review of Petition
❷Payment of Fees(Treasury Office) -which I heard was P3,000
❸Preparation & Posting (10 days)
❹Publication of Petition ( 2 weeks)
❺Decision of CFN
❻Submission of Petition (NSO Manila)
❼Affirmation of Decision
❽Issuance of Finality

See? Reading these would let you imagine the money you should spend, the time you should spare, and the patience you should hold. So you realize the simplier way to fix your mind on your children's first name.

I should Do

My mother, whom I told the processes I should go, told me to get an advice from legal office on changing my first name error. She said that if following my live birth certificate name would spend a much lesser time, effort and money, then I should do follow it rather than changing it at all. I answered her, I would've get sick again. :) I just really love my name today.

Although, in reality, I just really don't know where to get the financial support for me  to fix things up, but I know at least I had the chance. I had started to gather the requirements I needed and all I hope was for me to fix my first name error for the better future ahead of me being a mom and a woman of today.


I am hoping to hear from you guys about how you had in a way involve for fixing first name errors and share it with us. :)





Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Mom's Birthday Today

Happy Birthday Mama!
Mama & Papa
Today's my mom's 52nd  birthday. We had started the day with a 'mananita' activity. In short, with a prayer lead by the four of the greatest and oldest leaders in our little community in church.

We were really happy about it. Everybody wish my mom to be happy. Yes. happy! Recently, a really hard trial had been through with us. Although we still working on it as a family. The family as of today is not really in a good situation but I know each one of us still continue to fight.

I'm just glad that my mom chooses us to be complete rather than choosing to fight with the battle alone. As they always say:
The family that prays together, stays together.

Happy birthday Mama. Thank you for almost 30 years of taking good care of us. Thank you for the unconditional love, and sorry for the misunderstandings we had. I know in that we continue to understand each other. I became a mom and that I owe to you. What I learned today, was for what you had thought us.Thank You and we love you so much.

Monday, July 16, 2012

Monster Questions...


Have you ever experienced being asked by your children with 'monster questions'? Yes, I called them as monster questions because just really don't know where I could find the answers or even deliver an answer on a way they would understand.

One day, I was working on my blog when my eldest son, Ares, asked me a question: ' Why does I don't have an H. in my name?' I figured out what is he talking about. And I understood that it was all about his middle name. Yes, he has no middle name and he carries my surname for the reason that he's father was not there to acknowledge his surname being carried by our son, in short an illegitimate child but not unwanted.

So, again I understood that I was asked again a 'monster question'. So, I hurriedly looked for a better, easy-to-understand answer. I told him that his father was not there physically to recognized him on his birth certificate and explaining it in a much broad and easy way. As I was looking at him, I saw a still unacceptable confused mind. I wonder if he really got my explanation, but he did stop asking again.

Whew! What a day! I wish those monster questions would never come again, but I know it wouldn't . For all we know that children as of today are really smarter and confused than we thought.

Have you ever asked monster questions by your kids?How did you deal with it. I would really appreciate to get a response from you guys being a mom and a woman.